(picture stolen from Auntie Jenny)
I have not been sleeping. I don't think that it is very funny. I actually get really worked up about it, and then I end up having a minor melt down in the wee hours of the morning. I am worried about myself, and Paul is too. It will be the only time you will ever hear me say that I am excited for a Dr. appointment. I am going to fix myself, if that is possible. I really hate going to the Dr. I could go my whole pregnancy with two appointments...one to tell the sex of our baby, and one to tell me that it is time to have the baby.
But in the wee hours of the morning, when I have hours of sleeplessness I have time to think. Sometimes it is good happy thoughts that I want to jump up and write down, because it is those thoughts that remind me of my amazing life that has been created with Paul and Van.
Last night my thoughts turned to our plan for when this baby arrives. I thought about when Van, our first, was born. It was...What movie were we going to go see the night before I got induced? Who was going to be the first to get the call? Who was going to be the first to see our new baby? I then realized that these are all my same thoughts for our new addition. Who cares what movie we will see as a family, but I know who will get the first call...Our Van. Who will be our first visitor...Our Van. After all Van is our world, and should be the first.
Even though I know I have enough love for our Bri/Vin...Van will always be the one that made me a Mom, and I love her immensely for that.